A Werewolf in Hogwarts
by Wonderrland
Summary: Story following Remus Lupin at his first year at Hogwarts. Will be uploading a new chapter everyday, hopefully, if people like it.
1. The Call of the Wild

'Now, my son. You have got to be brave tonight. Can you do that for me?'

He looked at his mother who was bending down the be eye level with him, her hands were grasping his shoulders and her voice was infected with fear he couldn't understand.

'I can be brave!' he said with such pride she almost believed he'd be alright.

'I know you can.' she said smiling a sweet smile at him before standing up straight.

'But, why do I have to be brave?' he wondered aloud.

She looked down at him constantly as she lead him into the garden, what could she tell him? She'd been going over this in her mind for days, but nothing had come to her. He could see that her face wasn't hiding her true feelings well, she was sad - but why she was sad, he didn't know.

'Why do I have to be brave?' he asked again more urgently this time.

His mother once again found herself kneeling to her boy with a fake smile on her face. 'Listen, do-do you .. Err-' she was cut off by her husband calling to her. 'Darling.'

He walked over to them both, wand in his hand which was by his hips. He'd been doing spells .. 'I'll tell him.' he told his wife, looking her in the eyes. His tone was warm and calming. He imitated his wife's position and kneeled to his son. They both watched her go to the other side of the garden with her head in her hands.

'Why do I have to be brave tonight father?' he asked once more.

'Do you remember the accident you hand last month? With the big dog.' he asked with so much effort he was sure his son would see right through him.

'Y-yes, what about it?'

'Well, you see my boy, when he … bit you … let's just say he made - made you a little ill.' said his father, his hands were tight around his waist, if his father held him tighter he was sure he'd explode.

'I'll?' he wanted an answer but this made him even more confused.

'Yes,' said John, 'once a month.'

'Just once?'

'Just once a month. One night a month you'll be ill, be we'll be there for you in the morning.'

'What will happen to me?' he asked. He had been feeling a bit headachy and sweaty lately but … that was just a fever, that's what they told him.

'You'll-you'll … change - but you'll change back to normal come sunrise.' he added hastily after seeing his sons scared look.

The only thing he knew that did that was a werewolf, 'But werewolf's aren't real ..'

'They are son.'

'What? Did-did I?' he was sure he had thought that and not said it aloud. 'So, I'll be a monster? Like in the stories ..' he said, as if stating a fact rather then asking.

'No! No Remus, you will _not_ be a monster.' he said kissing him on the forehead. 'I've built you a place to be once a month. You won't hurt _anyone. _You'll never be a monster Remus. Believe that.'

He nodded, he didn't know what to say, everything he'd heard about werewolf's was bad, how could he not be too? They both knew this would happen, and they told him the night it would happen. They had a month, did they not think he could handle knowing earlier?

A loud _clang _of a door being opened and hitting a wall raided his thoughts. His father had lead him to the odd looking shed that he had been building at the bottom of the garden this past month without realising it.

'You will stay in here for the night Remus. We'll come and get you in the morning.' said his father.

His mother came over and gave him a hug, a hug so tight she didn't want to let go. Her tears were trickling down onto the top of his sandy hair.

'Will you stay with me?' he said, talking into her chest.

'I can't Remus, it's not safe for me … You have to do this on your own, son.' she said, pulling away from him and rubbing her eyes dry. 'Be brave.' she whispered as he entered the room. The door was then closed and locked.

Then John raised his wand and charmed the little shed so no sound would escape from it. 'Good luck, my son.' he whispered.


	2. A Little Bit of Courage

**5 Years Later.**

'Remus! Remus wake up, you don't want to miss the train!' he heard his mum calling from the bottom of the stairs. He had trouble working out if it was part of his dream or not at first but then everything became clearer. It was September 1st, the day he would being _**Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry**__._

'Coming mum!' he shouted back groggily to her as he reluctantly got out of bed. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes then made his way down to breakfast.

'There you are.' said as he entered the kitchen. 'Now eat up quickly.' she added as she put some toast onto a plate and placed it at the table.

'OK.' Remus said, still tired , he slumped into the chair and took a bite.

His father was sat across from him reading _**The Daily Prophet**_. Remus liked the wizard newspaper, the pictures moved. That was cool.

Remus sighed after eating one slice of toast. He wasn't really hungry this morning, he was too nervous to eat, what if no one liked him? What if everyone found out there was a werewolf in Hogwarts?

'Something up?' his father asked, he had stopped reading and was watching his son playing with his breakfast.

'What-what if Professor Dumbledore was wrong? What if I make no friends? What if everyone finds out? What if I hurt someone?' every sing tiny microscopic little thing that had been bothering him poured out. 'What if people are scared of me?'

'_If, if_ this, _if_ that. Remus don't think like that, you're a great young man, very likable and loyal.' said his father. 'Plus, Albus Dumbledore said that he would do everything he could to help you out and no one would find out unless it came from your mouth. He's a great man Remus, trust in him.'

'I guess he did seem sincere and nice and everything …'

'Right you are! Now if you're done eating, go and get dressed so we can leave soon. And bring your trunk down.' said John as he dived back into the newspaper.

Remus smiled as he left the kitchen and ran back up to his room. By the end of the day he would be a Hogwarts student.

He threw _**Hogwarts: A History**_,(a book he had been reading these last couple of days) into his trunk, clasped the locks and dragged it to the door. He had packed everything else last night after dinner. He opened his wardrobe after undressing and threw on the remainder of his clothes; a pair of beige trousers: a green top and some black shoes. He gave his room one last sweep, in case he had missed anything, grabbed the handle of his trunk and started to pull it down the stairs. It made too loud a noise that his mum sent out his father to carry it down instead.

The journey to Kings Cross Station was a tense one, John kept trying to hype Remus up by telling his stories from his life at Hogwarts, Remus's mind was too busy to actually be listening and his mum was smiling too often and trying to make small talk.

'Ready?' said John.

'Ready.' said Remus, copying his fathers actions and leaning against the wall.

The way to get to Platform nine and three quarters was an odd one, you had to walk through the wall separating platforms nine and ten, carefully so no one saw. Then before you could blink a great red train would be stationed at the platform before you and you're on the magical platform.

'Wow.' breathed Remus. His father was smiling at him.

The sight was great, there were so many wizards around him, finding seats on the train, saying goodbye to their families, meeting up with friends they hadn't seen over the summer. It made Remus forget his fear for a little while.

'This way Remus, let's put your luggage on.' said John, guiding his son in and out of people towards the train.

Once that had been done he took Remus to one side, away from prying ears. 'I'm so proud of you Remus. You've had this thing working inside of you for five years now and you've been more than a saint about it. You are so strong Remus. Even I don't think I could have handled it at the age you had to.' he saw the words sink into his son, hoping it would give him a little bit of courage. 'Have a good time at Hogwarts, make friends, be yourself and don't worry so much. It'll be fine.'

Remus gave a childish grimace as both his father and mother kissed him on the head and wished him farewell.

'Write as often as you can!' his father shouted to him.

'I will!' Remus yelled back at him as he ran to the train and climbed aboard.

He found and empty compartment and sat down by the window. When the clock struck eleven the train was set in motion and began to leave the platform, he waved to his father who waved back until neither of them could no longer see the other.


	3. Flames, Trains and Other First Years

Remus sat there for a while on his own, there were a few passing students, Seventh Years maybe, who muttered something about First Years and walked off again.

He pulled his knees up to his chest and sat staring at his hands. Little flames started to emerge, missable to the eye but then they grew bigger, to the medium size they always did. Remus cupped his hands and let the flames sit in his bowl shaped hands.

Remus could always produce flames ever since he could remember, he wasn't sure if he liked when this happened though. His father would tell him to embrace it and see if he could do anything with them, make them bigger or move them around. Even if he wanted to try that, he had no idea where to begin.

He sat like that for a while, until two boys swung open the compartment door and ran in. Remus' legs shot to a more formal sitting position and when they looked at him he clapped his hands shut in an instant. _Please stop burning,_ he thought, _please, please stop, _and when he opened them slightly, to his relief the flames were gone.

'What were you hiding from us?' asked one of the boys, after shutting the door and sitting opposite Remus, next to the other.

'What were you two running from?' said Remus, hoping he didn't sound too rude.

The boy looked at him sceptically, 'Touché' he said, smiling lightly. 'My name's James, and this is Sirius.' He pointed to his companion. 'We're new this year too.'

'Nice to meet you.' he said as he outstretched his hand. 'I'm Remus Lupin.' James shook his hand politely and Sirius gave a half-heated nod, still looking at Remus' hands.

'We were running away from some fifth years. We tried to hex them.' said the boy with black curly hair called Sirius, who until now had been silent.

'Sirius!' James interjected but Sirius carried on.

Leaning forward he said to Remus, 'Now, what were you hiding?'

'Sirius, he doesn't have to tell us if he doesn't want to. He doesn't even know us.'

'But, well I- … fine then.' said Sirius, not really wanting to drop it and slumping back in his seat. 'You know we won't tell anyone, I mean we just tried to hex fifth years and we haven't even been sorted yet. We're in no place to judge.'

'I n-never thought you would …' Remus said.

'Good.' said Sirius, he was looking pleased. 'Continue.'

'Continue?'

'Yeah, with your story. I told you what we did. It's only fair.' he said smugly. James trying to look as though he didn't agree with his friend but his look of amusement wasn't hidden well at all.

'I … was just … con-conjuring … f-f-flames …' Remus mumbled quietly.

'What was that?' said James. 'I didn't _quite _catch that, Remus.'

'I was just conjuring flames … or something.' he told them, his voice much louder than before.

'You know how to do that?' James asked him, he sounded impressed. Remus was certain he must know how to too, after all he just hexed some students, older students.

'I don't know how I do it. It just happens sometimes. Dad said if I did the actual spell it would be great. He said I should try it once I get to Hogwarts.'

'Can you do it now?' asked Sirius, he intrigued now too.

'I'm not sure …' he admitted.

'Oh …' said Sirius, the excitement leaving his face.

'But I-I could try.' Remus added quickly. He prayed for the flames to come, he prayed hard. And they did. As soon as they appeared Sirius started to wave his fingers over them slowly.

'That's cool.' he said. 'It's nice and warm.'

'Does it hurt?' James inquired.

'Not at all.' replied Remus. He was grinning at James and Sirius stupidly now. Like an idiot, but he didn't care. All he could think was that maybe he could make friends after all.


	4. The Marauders are Sorted

**Note: I put Xenophilius Lovegood into the sorting because I just guessed his age and house etc.**

Remus stood in a huddle before a stool and an old hat with the boys and girls who would be his classmates for the next seven years. They all seemed rather nice, he looked around the group and saw a beautiful girl with lovely red hair standing next to a snake of a boy with long greasy black hair. They seemed to be friends, which seemed odd to Remus but he wasn't one to judge, not after what he was.

'Black, Sirius.'

One of the boys he had met on the train had been called up, he looked nervous, agitated, he made his way up and sat down on the stool. His face washed with nerves as the old hat was placed upon his head.

It took a few moments before the hat shouted, 'GRYFFINDOR!' A chorus of cheers and applause came from the table to his left as they welcomed their new friend to their house. The Black boy was smiling, relieved.

'Evans, Lily.' the red haired girl snapped her head away from the greasy haired boy, said something rushed to him then took her place on the stool. The hat once more belted out 'GRYFFINDOR!' She jumped down the steps with a grin on her face, set opposite the Black boy and introduced herself to her house. After that was done she sat with her green eyes engaged on the greasy haired boy, obviously hoping he'd be in the same house as she.

'Lovegood, Xenophilius.' was the next name he heard, followed by the hat bellowing, 'RAVENCLAW!' Xenophilius was a tall, lanky boy with white/blonde hair that shone in the candle light.

'Lupin, Remus.' It was his turn. His insides felt like they were doing summersaults as he pushed his way slowly through the crowd, he felt as though all eyes were on him, like they all knew.

His eyes fell on the Headmaster in the middle of the Staff table, he was watching Remus intently. He remembered Professor Dumbledore coming to his house not so long ago. He had come to convince Remus and his parents that if he wanted he could come to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft of Wizardry, no matter what he would be accepted at Hogwarts, it'd be a true second home for him. After a long conversation and another after he had left, the Lupin's had decided that Remus was to go. He had been so excited at first, but now all he could think was what he was going to do once a month, what if he hurt someone?

Professor Dumbledore gave him an encouraging nod, so he smiled faintly back and sat down.

There was a long moment under that hat when the hat talked to him, read him like a book. He thought it would tell him and his infected soul to leave Hogwarts and never come back. But his heart jumped as the hat confirmed that he too would be in Gryffindor.

He gave a sigh of relief and made his way to the Gryffindor table where he was greeted by everyone with much enthusiasm that for a second, he felt safe for once.

'Hi again.' said Sirius, smiling.

'Hi.' Remus replied. He turned to the girl opposite them and said, 'Hello.'

She returned the greeting with a smile and lit up eyes. 'I'm Lily Evans.'

'Remus Lupin.'

'Nice to meet you.' she said whilst shaking his hand.

Remus didn't reply, but gave a timid smile. He wasn't so sure it _was_ nice to meet him.

He turned back to the sorting as two new Gryffindors made their way over to the table, a brown haired girl and a rat-faced boy.

'Hi, I'm Peter.' said the boy, red faced and chubby.

'Remus.' he replied without enthusiasm.

'Sirius.' Sirius said in the same tone as he.

The boy looked around the house table, looking at everyone as though they all frightened him. Not wanting to catch his eye, Remus looked away to the sorting once again.

'Potter, James.' The other boy from the train was called up. He sat under the hat and got the confirmation of having all that Gryffindor needed of him. Sirius shot out of his seat and cheered loudly, clapped his friend on the back and sat down again. James sat down next to Remus, opposite Peter and said 'Hello' to everyone. He was confident, the most out of every new person here Remus imagined.

There were a few more minutes of name calling and house placing before the greasy haired boy took to the stool.

'Snape, Severus.' he was called.

The girl across from them sat so up right in her seat she was nearly standing on the bench. 'Sev …' she said, disappointed as the boy was sorted into Slytherin. She watched him walk back to the Slytherin table, gave him a smile when he looked back to her then sat down, she was upset.

'You're friends, with _him_?' blurted out James Potter, amused.

'Yes.' she snapped back, and that was the end of it.

James gave her the once over, smiling even though her head was down staring at the plates of food that had appeared suddenly after the sorting had ceased. Remus felt sorry for her. She didn't seem to know anyone else. He felt the same, he knew Sirius and James a little, but not properly.

He spent the rest of the feast talking to James, Sirius and Peter. They all seemed like nice guys and Remus wasn't in a position to be throwing friend opportunities away …


	5. Feeling Down

Remus had enjoyed his first week at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. He enjoyed Charms, Transfiguration and Defence Against the Dark Arts classes, as did his two best friends James Potter and Sirius Black. Their worm of a friend, Peter Pettigrew did not seem as able to work magic, he was rather, appalling at everything he tried.

Despite his growing fondness of the school and everyone in it, today Remus had a gut-wrenching feeling following him around all day. That feeling was nervousness. It was Monday and the full moon would be upon him at the end of the week and he still hadn't heard from Professor Dumbledore about what he would do and where he would go for his transformations.

He walked down the corridor to Charms class, James and Sirius to his left and Peter trailing along behind him. His thoughts were swimming around his mind, and he only caught little of his friends conversation.

'-and in Potions just now. No wonder his hair's so greasy.' he heard James mutter to Sirius.

Remus knew who they were talking about. Severus Snape. A Slytherin boy in their year who had long greasy black hair and a large crooked nose. For some reason, neither of his friends took a liking to him, rather they seemed to dislike him from the first glance. Remus on the other hand, was still deciding to not join in on their conversations when they evolved around him.

'I know, he practically bloody sits in the damn cauldron.' Remus heard Sirius reply.

'_Snivellus._' James turned up his nose and said the word as if he had kept it inside any longer it would've poisoned him. He heard Sirius's bark of laughter and James began to laugh too.

'Snivellus?' asked Remus, he had never heard them use that before.

'Yes Remus, Snivellus.' said James with pride that Remus wasn't sure he should have at that moment.

'Is something wrong with Snape's new and improved name?' said Sirius, he too turning his head to look at Remus.

'No.' mumbled Remus and looked down at his feet. They all walked in silence for a while before Sirius broke the silence and said: 'What's the matter with you lately anyway? You look half-dead.'

Remus stopped rubbing his forehead(for he had a headache), tried to pass it off as though he was just moving his hair from his eyes. 'N-nothing's wrong.' he said indifferently and looking to Sirius. 'I'm fine.'

'Are you sure?' James asked, kicking a piece of litter along with his foot. 'Maybe you should go and see Madam Pomfrey.'

'_I'm fine_!' Remus snapped. His hand returning to his head and his eyes returning to the floor.

He could feel them looking at him and he heard Peter wince behind him. All of them were shocked and not knowing what to say, Peter included - but that was hardly new news, Peter hardly ever spoke. Remus had never once shouted since he came here, he didn't even think he had shouted at home. Not after the incident. He felt his mother looked at his less since then so he had always done chores for her and been nice. He never got angry.

But he was angry now, but not at them, not really. He was scared that if they kept pressing they'd fine out just by looking into his eyes. Not knowing if that kind of magic was possible for wizards of age eleven, he mumbled that they had reached Charms class to his friends. With his head still down he rushed in ahead of them and took a seat at the back of the room in the corner.


	6. Treacle Fudge

Thursday had dawned and since Monday no one had uttered a word about Remus' dramatic change in appearance and mood. That is until lunchtime and James could no longer hold his tongue.

'OK, I can' take this anymore! Remus, you look like death now.' said James as he threw down his fork which made a loud clattering sound. His voice, was infected with concern that he could hide. 'Please go to Madam Pomfrey, _please_.' He added emphasis on the last word and looked Remus straight in the eyes.

Remus couldn't help but give a slight smile when Sirius cheered with agreement and Peter started to nod his head vigorously. 'I-I can't-'

'You can't. You_ can't_. Why the hell not?' snapped James.

'I mean, I don't need too.' Remus stammered, not looking neither of his friends in the eye. 'I used to get headaches at home a lot. They go away eventually. You don't need to worry, I promise.' It was only a half-lie, and Remus could deal with that. He did get headaches when the full moon drew nearer but they weren't the "whole" reason like he had just made out. But he wasn't lying, not really …

He looked up slowly with his eyes to see if they had bought it, none of them looked convinced. But Remus was saved from more interrogating when someone tapped him lightly on the shoulder. He turned to see Lily Evans standing behind him holding a letter. Her red hair sat neatly on her shoulders. The look in her beautiful green eyes however change as soon as Remus turned to see her.

'Holy cricket!' she gasped, putting a hand over her mouth. She sat down on the bench next to Remus. 'What's the matter with you Remus?' she cried. 'You look so sick.'

'I'm fine Lily, really.' he assured her, hoping his voice was convincing enough, he rubbed the sweat off of his forehead and looked at her hand. 'What's that?' he asked as he indicated the letter in her right hand.

'Oh,' she said looking at her hand, as though someone had woken her from a daydream and she'd just realised where she was and what she was doing. 'This-this is for you.' she smiled. 'Professor Dumbledore asked me to bring it to you.'

'What is it about?' he asked her, even though he had a fleeting feeling he already knew the answer even if she didn't. She passed him the parchment and said: 'No idea, he didn't say. He just told me to get it to you as soon as I possibly could. I came here straight away.' she said smiling, she took a grape from the tray of fruit on the table in front of her and popped it into her mouth.

'Well, I've got to go I promised Sev I'd meet up with him.' she cast James and Sirius a fleeting look before standing up. 'I hope you get better soon,' she said to Remus, 'even though you're not ill.' And with that she turned, her hair dancing with her as she skipped out of the Great Hall to find her friend.

'Evans talks to _you._' said James once she had gone, sounding rather like a petulant child.

'Can you really blame her for not liking you?' asked Remus earnestly. 'You haven't exactly been the nicest person in the world.'

'How do you mean?'

'Well you accidentally hexed her last week-'

'_Accidentally_. We we're after Snivellus anyway.' James said smirking.

'That didn't help either. Snape's her friend James. She's not exactly going to like someone who hates her friend now is she?'

'She likes you.'

'I've never said or done anything rude or mean over Snape.' Remus told him. He watched James as he seemed to go into a sulk.

'What's in the letter?' said Sirius trying to pick up the conversation to a lighter note.

Remus shrugged and opened the letter. It read:

_Dear Remus._

_I request you come to my office as soon as you have received this note. On matters concerning of which you already know. _

_Yours Sincerely,_

_Albus Dumbledore._

_P.S. The password to my office is Treacle Fudge._

'"Concerning of which you already know . . ." what does that mean?' asked Sirus, who was now leaning over the table and reading the note too.

'I don't know.' said Remus hastily, and before he realised it the note had gone up in flames and was now a pile of ash on his lap.

'Well, apparently you _do._' Sirius persisted.

'Well he must be wrong, because I don't.'

'Right.' said James, now not as grumpy. 'Did you mean to set it alight.'

'Not really no.' It was the truth, he didn't mean to burn it but he didn't want Sirius reading any more.

He had finished his lunch in a rush, made his way to Dumbledore's office, said the password and walked up the steps to his office door. He knocked, waited until Dumbledore's voice called to him to enter then turned the handle. He didn't know anyone who had been in Dumbledore's office before, he didn't know what to expect, what it was maybe. It was a magnificent room, there were trinkets and odd appliances on tabletops around the room, many books.

'Ah, good afternoon, Remus.' said Professor Dumbledore, watching him as he took his office in.

'Headmaster.' said Remus, inclining his head an inch.

'Take a seat, Remus.' said the Headmaster, motioning to the chair on the opposite side of the desk. As Remus sat he pulled out a bowl, 'Sherbet Lemon?' he offered.

'Err .. No thank you Professor.' Remus said, gratefully declining.

'Right you are.' Mumled the Headmaster, who took one for himself, unwrapped it and placed it in his mouth. It was a while before he spoke again, and Remus began to grow agitated. 'I'm sorry to have left it so late, Remus. I know you must have been fretting this whole week.'

'Yeah, a little.' Remus admitted, looking down at his cupped hands on his lap.

'I have, I hope you're please to here, been perfecting the place where you will be transforming once a month from now on.' said Dumbledore calmly.

'You have?'

'Yes. The Whomping Willow, that was mentioned at the beginning of term feast, has not just been planted for frivolous admiration, but it has been planted for you.'

'For me?' Remus was confused, he hadn't really listened at the feast, he was too over washed with feelings of home and safety, he thought he was going to cry that night. As he thought it over, he still couldn't think how a tree was going to help him.

'Yes, for you, Remus. I have perfected a secret tunnel from underneath the tree to a shack on the outskirts of Hogsmeade. The Whomping Willow, hides that passage, keeping everyone safe, you included.' Dumbledore said, looking at Remus over his half-moon spectacles. 'A clever idea, I think, if it's not too bold to say.'

Remus smiled, 'Not too bold sir, you're a great Wizard from what I hear.'

The Headmaster laughed lightly, adverting his eyes, '… Flattering …'

Remus didn't know what to say, so he waited until Professor Dumbledore spoke again. He told him that he may leave to finish the rest of his daily lessons and to come back to his office after the school day ends.


	7. The Wind in the Whomping Willow

He made his way across the grounds with Professor Dumbledore, turning around every now and then to make sure no one had followed him. He arrived at the Whomping Willow in a matter of minutes, he must have ran, only he couldn't remember doing so and he wasn't sure the Headmaster could run. Standing away from the grasps of the tree's branches was Madam Pomfrey.

'Evening Remus.' said Madam Pomfrey sweetly.

'G-good evening Madam Pomfrey.' said Remus, his tone frail. Every few seconds he'd steal an upward glance to the sky as the Headmaster and the Nurse were exchanging a few words.

'Remus …' Dumbledore called, his voice was warm.

'How do I get past the tree?' asked Remus, snapping his head away from the sky and looking at the branches flying about beside him.

'Ah, that is the trick' said Dumbledore before picking up a long stick from the ground beside him. He took careful aim not to get hit and poked the knot in the middle of the tree trunk. Almost instantly the tree's branches stopped flying about so fast and it was now slow enough for someone to walk past without getting hit.

Professor Dumbledore motioned Remus to follow him as he made his way to the trunk and into the hole at the bottom, Madam Pomfrey followed suit at the end of the three.

'I will try to be here for you, for the first couple of months you turn until you feel ready enough to do it alone.' Professor Dumbledore said as the tip of his wand lit up so they knew where to go. 'If I cannot make it, I have shown you how to stop the Willow from badgering you. Madam Pomfrey will be here still and you will be perfectly safe.'

'OK.' said Remus as he squinted his eyes through the darkness.

The tunnel was rather disgusting seeing as it was newly made. It was cold, spiders were creeping along the top and every little thing made a great echo. It wasn't too long of a journey until they found light at the end of the tunnel.

'Wow …' said Remus, looking around the shack that had been built for him.

Yes.' said Dumbledore smiling. 'Now, we don't have too long before the moon comes up so I'll be as quick as I can. No one will be staying with you tonight, because of course you know it is too dangerous. But I will keep an eye on the Whomping Willow when I'm back in the castle. In the morning Madam Pomfrey will come and get you, she will bring you some new clothes and something to eat and fix you up if you have any injuries in the Hospital Wing.'

'OK.' Remus said again, he didn't really know what else to say.

'We should really be going now Poppy.' said the Headmaster turning to Madam Pomfrey. 'Good luck Remus.' he said giving him an encouraging smile. 'I will try and meet with you throughout the day tomorrow to see how you are.'

Dumbledore gave him one last calculating look and took off into the darkness with Madam Pomfrey.

He climbed two sets of stairs and settled into the furthest room from the hidden tunnel he could find. He closed the door and locked it, he hoped the Headmaster had put some charms on the place, because Remus knew that if he really wanted to his wolf side could probably get out. He walked over to the window, pulled back one curtain slightly and looked up at the sky. _Not long now, _he thought.

He wondered what would be thought of his disappearance by his friends as he stood in the middle of the room and undressed. He hadn't said anything of him not being there tonight, he tried to think of something throughout his last two lessons but nothing had come to him, so he left to meet Dumbledore without a word. He threw his clothes into a corner and stood there. Waiting.

He stood there, his heart beating only too fast, his chest heaving up and down a hundred times a second. The pain he knew only too well shot through him suddenly. The moon shone over him through a crack in the curtains. Everything in him was stretching, changing, breaking. His spine was growing and pain seared through his face as the snout of the werewolf became prominent. His screams were ear ringing and heart wrenching. It felt as though once every month his was being killed, tortured, and there was nothing he could do about it. Every time it happened he wanted to cry, he wanted to shout at it to stop and leave him alone it hurt so much. But he couldn't, and _it _wouldn't.

* * *

><p>He woke up the next morning and found his was still in the same room, he had cuts and bites all over his body, they stung like hells fire. The walls were ripped, the wallpaper hanging off of them. He had done a lot of damage to everything in the room. It wasn't long until he heard Madam Pomfrey calling to him. He called back to her, telling her what floor he was on, he unlocked the door and left a gap big enough for her to pass him some underwear and a large cloak through.<p>

Once he put his underwear on he beckoned her into the room. She let out a gasp as she was greeted with a boy covered in blood. 'Come here.' she said, draping the long cloak over him and picking up the remainder of his clothes that lay in the corner. 'Luckily it's early enough for you to go to the Hospital wing without anyone seeing you, dear boy.'

Like everyone had told him she could, she fixed him in a heartbeat. He was left though, with some scars. She kept muttering under her breath the whole time about how unfortunate a lad he was and how much it pained her to see one so young like this. He wasn't sure if she knew she was speaking aloud because she didn't seem to take any notice of his questioning stares.

* * *

><p>It was the end of period one by the time he had gotten changed and Madam Pomfrey said he was strong enough to leave. She gave him his wand before he left and he made his way down to Transfiguration. If they hadn't asked the Headmaster or their Head of House where he had been just yet, he knew he would have to come up with something right now. Before he entered the classroom.<p>

He knocked lightly on the classroom door opened it when he was bade to enter. 'Mr Lupin.' said Professor McGonagall, for two words she sounded very accusing.

'Sorry I'm late Professor.' He said after shutting the door behind him.

'Seeing as you've been a good student, I'm sure you have a good reason?' she walked through the desks and stopped in front of him.

'I-I …' What was he going to say? He couldn't tell the truth, but he still hadn't thought of anything to tell his friends let alone his teachers and the rest of his class that were listening in. Everyone was looking at him now. 'I-I went home for the night, my mother was very ill you see. Dumbledore let me.' The words came out without being mulled over. He hoped that it was a good enough lie.

'_Professor _Dumbledore.' Professor McGonagall corrected him. 'Very well, take your seat and get someone to catch you up on what you've missed these first fifteen minutes.'

He took his usual seat next to Sirius, behind James and Peter. They all gave him inquiring looks as he got his books out of his bag and placed his wand on his desk. 'So,' he said, trying to sound casual, 'what have I missed?'


	8. Loony, loopy Lupin

It had been a week since Remus' first transformation at Hogwarts, his friends, luckily seemed to have bought his excuse for not being around much last Thursday and Friday morning. James, Sirius, Remus and Peter were making their way down to Lunch when they were stopped by the Schools' poltergeist, Peeves.

Peeves seemed to be entertaining himself by throwing books at passing students. The four friends got ready for their attack, but to their surprise Peeves dropped all of the books he was holding when he saw them. He looked nervous at first, but then his expression turned into a smile of pure malice. He began to laugh as he swooped down on them and hovered above their heads.

'Look who it is:,' he smiled, 'Loony, loopy Lupin, and his friends!' And with that he began to sing "Loony, loopy Lupin," at the top of his voice, cackling every so often and looking at Remus.

'Shut up,' snarled Sirius, 'Remus isn't loony or loopy.'

'Yeah, so bugger off why don't you.' snapped James. He too advancing on Peeves who had settled himself before them at their height.

'Ooooh …. This is more than Peevsie wanted … been keeping _secrets_, have you, loopy?' Peeves glided over James and Sirius and hovered before Remus and Peter. 'Oh, yes,' he beamed, 'I heard your conversation with …. Dumbledore!'

Remus stood there, shocked to the bone. Peeves couldn't know, he was surely bluffing. Remus was sure that neither he or the Headmaster had even muttered the word "Werewolf" in his office last week.

'I-I don't know what you're talking about …' Remus finally said, bringing his mind back into the present and not keeping his eyes fixated on anyone in the surrounding area.

'Oooh …' said Peeves, picking up his books again, 'not just secretive but a lying little monster aren't you?' At that moment Peeves threw the book, which hit Remus straight on his forehead.

'Ah!' cried Remus, rubbing his head with the palm of his hand.

Peeves sped of laughing and Remus could hear him start to sing "Loony, loopy Lupin," again down the corridor.

'Are you alright?' said James.

'Yeah, I'm fine.'

'What was that all about?' Sirius said, furrowing his brow. 'I thought you and Professor Dumbledore were arranging your overnight stay to see your mother.'

'We were.' Remus replied hastily.

'Then why did Peeves call you secretive and loony, loopy Lupin?' James asked.

Remus didn't like this, they were becoming too curious again. 'Why does _Peeves_, do anything?' said Remus, indicating the bruise that had appeared on his forehead.

James shrugged and Sirius mumbled "I guess .." under his breath. So, without another word the four friends made their way down to lunch, James and Sirius kicking one of Peeves' books between each other. Remus rubbing his head and thinking over his many thoughts, and Peter walking along behind them looking thoroughly confused.


	9. In the Library

**A/n: I'm sorry but this chapter doesn't really make any progress with the storyline. I haven't had enough time recently to think it through. But I promise that the next chapter, I will move forward. **

* * *

><p>Nearly three months later Remus was sitting in the library before dinner going over his transfiguration homework. He was nearly finished when Sirius walked in.<p>

Remus thought of Peeves for a brief moment, the poltergeist had gone to new levels around Remus. He would say that if he whispered one word about Peeves throwing stuff at hit and causing trouble he would till his friends the truth. Remus had never once heard Peeves say what he actually was, on occasion he wondered whether or not he actually knew. But he wasn't going to risk it. He could never risk his friends. Ever.

Sirius walked over to him and threw his bag down on the table, Remus snatched away the book he was working with before the bag hit it.

'What do you want, Sirius?'

'Moody are you? You sound moody …'He plonked himself down on the chair next to Remus and put his feet up on the one opposite him.

'No, I'm not moody. I was just genuinely asking what you wanted.' Remus replied, a little agitated.

'Just coming to see how you are.'

'And where's James and Peter?'

'James is having a little, "heated discussion" with our Head of Year and Peter,' he said, 'well, I have no clue where Peter is … but who really cares?'

'He's our friend.' Remus reminded him.

'Yes, but he's not exactly good at being one. He's so awkward and quiet all the time. You'd think he was a daft mute.'

Remus didn't reply, he didn't know what to say. So he kept quiet, his mother used to say, "if you have nothing nice to say, don't say it," Remus loved his mother and so he would follow her rules. No matter how far away she was. Not that he had anything bad to say either though …

'Now then, are you alright?' Sirius asked.

'Yeah, yes, I'm fine.' Remus tried to brush him off, writing something down on his parchment.

'Liar.'

'What?'

Sirius laughed at him mockingly. 'Tell me, how are you _really?_'

'What do you mean? I'm really fine!'

'How can you be fine when two of your relatives are ill?' Sirius inquired.

'Wha - oh, yeah well they'll get better.'

'Right …'

'I won't be here next Monday by the way.' Remus said suddenly.

'Why's that?' asked Sirius.

'I have to go - have to go and see my mum. She's still a little ill and Professor Dumbledore is letting me go and see her for a night.'

'She must be really ill the, if the Headmaster let's you leave for one night.' Sirius pondered.

'Err, yeah … I guess.' Remus shrugged. 'I don't …'

Remus leaned back over his homework and scribbled down the ending, he didn't dare look up until he had re-read it twice for he could feel Sirius's eyes digging into the back of his head.

As he sat there a familiar pain shot through his head, and a shiver ran down his spine. He rubbed his forehead with his knuckles of his free hand.

'What's wrong?' said Sirius, putting his arm around Remus's shoulders.

'I've just been working a little too hard is all. I'm alright, really.' he replied, a pang of guilt hit him for lying. Sirius had sounded rather worried. All three of them did when he showed some sign of being ill, he always covered it up though. He probably never left them feeling satisfied but they never asked any further anymore.

'Alright,' said Sirius, 'let's get going down to dinner then.' He ruffled Remus's hair before standing up and throwing his bag back over his shoulder.

'Don't.' said Remus, flattening down his hair. Sirius laughed his real bark of laughter this time, shaking his head.

'You and James,' he said, 'completely different when it comes to hair styles.'

Remus stuffed his homework back into his bag and put the book he was using back on the shelf. He grabbed his bad and walked with Sirius out of the library.

'You have some rather back luck, mate.' said Sirius, dragging his feet along the floor.

'How's that?'

'First your mum's ill, then your aunt, then someone hexes you and you have to spend the night with Madam Pomfrey. And now your mum is ill again, probably for a while because you have to go an see her again.'

Remus forced a smile and lowering his head, mumbled: 'You don't know the half of it …'

Sirius looked over at him with a heavy sigh. He raised his right leg and playfully kicked him on the arse.

'Hey!' Remus cried.

'Come on, lighten up!' Sirius smiled and kicked him lightly again. He mocked Remus's failed attempt at kicking in return, flung his arm around him again and hugged him. They kept in that position until they sat down in the hall in a few minutes.

'I was only kidding you know.'

'About what?'

'You mum, I'm sure she will be fine. Mums are though little creatures.'

Remus looked at his friends face, up close he saw the anguish on his face as he guessed he was thinking of his own mother, whom he loathed.


End file.
